Gravity
by Secks Puppet
Summary: Flash to da Past, yo! Tsume and Toboe thoughts around and during eppy 4. So yeah, slash...ishness. Review!


Okay peeps, I was having some serious word of mouth when I was writing this thing, so it's pretty long.

Summary: Flash to the Past, Tsume and Toboe's thoughts on one another around and during episode 4. So yeah, slash...ish

Disclaimer: Whatev.

**Gravity**

For some odd reason... Tsume, I never want to be from your side. I don't know what it is that draws me to you, but I am. It's like an electric force, and no matter what happens, it will never shut off, and I will always be drawn to you. Ever since I met you, and became your 'friend', it was there. I can't describe it... but, do you know what it is that I'm talking about? Do you feel the same gravity?

_You aren't my friend... Toboe, and that's the way it will always be. I don't want to be around kids like you, people who can't handle stupid things like blood and death. Kids like you are a waste of my time. But thanks to that god damn Kiba, I can't get away from you. You're always there, circling me like the moon and Earth. There was gravity, and you fell for it. _

I've always wanted someone special, and I think the more we all travel together, the more special we become to each other. I guess I'm kind of stupid for thinking this, but I think I'm just excited. I would never tell you this though, you'd probably just call me an idiot or a stupid kid. And whenever you do that, it hurts me. And I love it too, because it means that someone is paying attention to me. Someone is acknowledging me. And that is something I've always wanted.

_I never liked to deal with people, and to tell you the truth, I hate traveling with everyone. I don't want to say this though, I can't stand when the Brat talks, or when Porky plays referee. I can't stand to see you upset too. It pains me in a way I don't want to feel pain. And it scares me, you scare me. Because you make me feel something I don't want to feel. And it's not right. I hate it when you look at me with those innocent eyes of yours, it makes me feel weak and insecure. Something that I don't want to feel._

Kiba, Hige, and you Tsume are all my friends. And I couldn't stand to watch them die or get hurt, so I want us to be together always, watching over each other. That is why I chased after you that day. I didn't want you to get hurt, I wanted you to stay. You pushed me aside, but only death could hinder me from following you. There's that gravity again. Did you feel it?

_Brat, Porky, and you Kid are the least favorable people to spend time with. I could care less what happened to you, so that is why I left. You don't need me to be around and help you. But still you followed me. But you didn't give up, one thing I admire about you. You're strong, unlike me. So I desired to get away from you. But you bounced back. Back to me._

You saved me Tsume, much more than once. And for that, I am grateful. But when I look back, I find myself wondering why. You said you hated me, despised me. If that's true why did you save me? Do want me to die or live?

_You killed me Toboe, so many times. And I hate you for it, and I don't know why. I hate you, and I don't at the same time. I forced myself to save you, because I don't want you to be hurt. I don't want you to die, but I want you apart from me._

I remember when we were being chased by that huge monster. You were hurt, and I didn't like it. But you pushed me away, insisting it was nothing. And when you told me we had to jump, it was the only way we could survive, I was afraid. And then you touched me. It was the first time you had touched me on your own free will, and it filled me with fire. I felt like a lit fuse, about to reach the dynamite. And I loved it. And you were hurt because of it. I didn't mean to hurt you.

_You remember that time that huge robot monster thing was chasing us? I was hurt, and I saw in your eyes you blamed yourself because of it. But it was my decision. When the road came to a drop-off and we had to jump, I knew you were afraid. And I took your hand, something I couldn't believe I did. I must've been acting on instinct, but who knew instinct could be so nice? I felt like a hurricane, power-surged, a feeling I have never felt before. And I barely felt the pain._

I was afraid for you, Tsume. You weren't waking up, and bleeding badly. So I did what I had to do. It felt like my heart shattered when you pushed me away, rejecting me from wanting to help you. But I was glad that you were alright. I gazed at you, getting an eyeful of your delicious body. That scar on your chest intrigued me, but still you turned away.

_I knew you were just trying to help. I didn't want anyone helping me, I'm fine on my own. I want you to understand that, kid, because when I push you away you're hurt. And the more gravitation between us, the more it hurts you. Kid, you're something I can't explain, something that shouldn't be but is. So I turn away from you._

Tsume, do you realize how much I care about you? After sitting in that cave with you for what seemed like hours, I knew I would do anything for you. I would die if that made you happy. But I can't explain why. It just is. That is why I risk my life for you, something I wouldn't normally do for people I barely know. But you are special to me, the world to me.

_Toboe, why can't I hate you like I should? I hate you kid, but it's not the hate I feel for the Brat. It's the kind of jealousy hatred, it's not pure or straight-forward. I hate you for everything you've done to me, the way you've changed me. But it's a different hate, an alien feeling. And I don't like it. You changed me kid, for better ad for worse._

I've finally figured it out. Tsume, no matter what happens, I will always love you. I can't describe what kind of love it is, though. It's a special one, I'll keep it at that. I don't want to lose it, or you. I won't tell you though, I'll look on from the sidelines. Because that will make me happy, and I know it will make you happy too. And that is what I want. You are everything to me, and that will not change.

_I'll never figure it out. Kid, I hate you, but at the same time, I can't do anything but... but not hate you? I can't find the words. I don't when they'll come to me, but they will. And if they do in this lifetime, I'll never tell you. I don't know if it would hurt you more than I already have. I will not mar the perfect damage I've inflicted on you. I will keep you the way you are, always mine._

I will always follow you Tsume, to the ends of Paradise. I will do it for all of us, because I love you.

_I'll work harder for you Kid. But for now, ignore the gravity, and we'll both be happy with one another._

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Just review please, for my sake, and yours (give a cookie, get a cookie).


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